By Thomas Ngala
I have battled with depression, that was really quite bad, but then acting made me pull through because I just focus on what I love doing, says Mpali’s Chola whose real names are Helena Kaumba.
The young movie star who keeps people glued to their television sets through her exceptional acting in the local drama series called Mpali went into depression after losing her mother on 1st July 2020.
The loss of her mother left her in a bad space where she isolated herself from close friends and families.
Questions like ‘why would God just take away something that I really love the most in my life’ constantly popped up in her head, questions she never had answers to.
In a special interview with Daily Star, Kaumba said “I don’t really like talking about it because I don’t want to go back to that place. On 1st July 2020, I lost my mother. I was so close to my mum we were like best friends. I was in a very terrible place, I felt like there was nothing to live for.”
“I just decided to ghost everybody. I constantly took long walks and just crying, having questions in my heard with no answers. Asking myself where am I going to get the answers from because I don’t understand this? Why would the world be so cruel to me? I felt like, why would God just take away something that I really love the most in my life? Like why? I had all these questions in my head then I just realized that okay I had just spent about two months just going about this. Just being careless with my life, I didn’t care about anything.”
However, the love the late mother had for her and her acting career made her triumph over the depressing phase she was in.
Her mother was the biggest fan she has ever had. When Kaumba got a contract from A List Media to play the role of Chola in Mpali, her mother was the happiest.
The first day she was on set, her late mother, being the biggest fan drove her there.
Kaumba feels that the best way of dealing with depression is by opening up to people around you.
“Then I told myself, I remembered when I got a contract from A List Media to participate in Mpali, my mum was the happiest person ever. She was so proud of me. She supported me, she is even the one who drove me there on the first day I went on set. Then I asked myself why am I doing this instead of doing something that would make my mum proud where she is? Because I remember the smile my mum had when I got that contract and I was like okay I will make her proud wherever she is,” she said.
“It was until then that I started approaching friends and family and they helped me go through it. I found out that one of the best way of dealing with depression is by opening up and talking about it. Pain is there, we cannot take away the pain. But then I decided to make my pain be my strength. I decided to make all the anger, all the rage I had within me to go to use. Trust me, all the time I was on set I was just thinking of my mum and I was acting to my fullest.”
Kaumba understands that a lot of people are going through a lot of things “but we are so judgmental towards them instead of just asking what’s really going on.”
She advises young people to open up to their close relatives and friends whenever they are depressed.
“I have come to understand and realize that we come from a country where we don’t really raise mental health awareness. A lot of people are going through a lot of things but we are so judgmental towards them instead of just asking what’s really going on. Let’s learn to talk to people. You don’t know who might want to hear good words from you. At times you don’t really have to ask, just go to a person and say you know whatever you are going through I don’t really want you to tell me about it but just know that I am here, you can talk to me, I can give you an ear. Just make them realize that there is always a silver lining on a dark cloud,” she said.
“My advice to the people, especially the youths who are going through difficulties just talk to people and do what you love doing the most. At this point, if people are going through staff they can come to me, I can help them in the best way possible that I can. I can listen to them; I can advise where I can manage because I wouldn’t want a person to go through that. Trust me that is a dark place where nobody wants to be in. you feel like you are being suffocated with your emotions, you feel like you have mixed emotions, you don’t know if you have to cry, you don’t know what you have to do with yourself.”
She stresses the need for people to seek God’s guidance when depressed.
“And above all ask God to guide you through the process. Ask God to give you strength…..sometimes people get scared to talk to people because they are scared that what if this person tells the whole world that am going through this? What if this person exposes me? You know all sorts of fear. But if you put God first and just declare upon your life that God…..even the Bible says God cannot put you in a situation where you can’t pull through,” she said.
“If you put your mind to wanting to heal you will. God works through different people. Talk to your friend, talk to your partner, talk to your sisters, talk to your brothers, just talk to somebody.”
Credit: Daily Star
